Category Archives: Sport

Your Child’s Hair Could Affect His Discipline


This girl is doomed. Make sure the same does not happen to your child.

Hair and hairstyles have become a major issue in South Africa. Ever since the rebellion of some youths from Pretoria High School for Girls, there has been much debate about the correlation between hairstyles, hair length and discipline.

Finally, science has an answer. It has been discovered that anyone who does not maintain a neat, conservative hairstyle is absolutely doomed. If it’s a girl, tie those locks up, and if it’s a boy, make sure he keeps his hair short, or else… Such a person will have no chance to live a meaningful life and achieve any kind of success. Warn your children now.

If you need proof that anything other than a conventional, short, neatly cut hairstyle leads to focus and discipline, look no further than these young men who wasted their youth by growing their hair.

When Werner Kok grew his hair long, the curly mess caused him to make a nuisance of himself. His bad behaviour forced him onto the rugby field. Further ill-discipline resulted in him being included in the South African Sevens squad, also known as the Blitzbokke.

Things got worse for Kok. Regular lapses in discipline finally landed him in real hot water, and he was sentenced to be World Sevens Player of the Year for the 2015 season. Life gave Kok a second chance when he got injured at the start of the 2016 season.

There was hope that, because of his injury and time away from rugby, Kok would regain his focus, cut off his hair and do something meaningful with his life. This was not to be. In a total disregard for discipline, Kok kept his blonde locks as long as ever.

Finally, Kok reached an all-time low when he, through complete lack of discipline, was included in the squad to go to the Rio Olympics in 2016, where he added a bronze medal to his World Cup gold (2013) and Commonwealth gold (2014).

Not only is Seabelo Senatla’s hair long, but it’s also African. The pony-tailed speedster’s chance to obtain any kind of self-discipline is completely ruined. His dreadlocks were eventually seen by Paul Treu, who grabbed him and threw him into the Blitzbok team.

Despite tying his thin locks up in an effort to regain some self-control, Senatla’s raw, unabashed ill-discipline turned him into a devastating force, and he scored tries with reckless abandon. His wild, fast-paced life finally caught up with him, and turned him into the leading try scorer on the rugby sevens circuit two seasons in a row.

Senatla’s absolute lack of discipline got him gold medals in the Sevens World Cup (2013) and the Commonwealth Games (2014). Still, Senatla remained unapologetic about his complete lack of discipline, until he was also expelled to Rio for the Olympic Games.

Although he was initially saved from the bronze medal through injury before the semi-finals, fellow inmate Francois Hougaard (obviously also ill-disciplined – just look at all those tattoos!) unceremoniously dumped his own bronze medal onto Senatla, claiming he deserved it more.

Much has already been written about Cecil Afrika. Some blame him for the terrible discipline of young men like Kok, Senatla, and others. Afrika has been swinging his lengthy braids around long before they could shave, and there’s no doubt that they would have looked up to him.

Long-haired lack of discipline has meant that Afrika remained a failure most of his life. He was thrust into the Blitzbok sevens squad as far back as 2009, and even won the World Sevens Series as part of the 2009 team. His ill-discipline knew no bounds, and he was eventually World Sevens Player of the Year in 2011.

As he got older, Afrika never regained any form of discipline. His hair remained long and braided, and he continued to be a crucial member of the notorious Blitzbok team, until he too got sent to the Rio Olympics to carry the burden of winning an Olympic medal.

Few people have discipline as bad as Justin Geduld. Sometimes he zigs to the left, other times he zags to the right. His sidestep is almost unstoppable. Maybe, if he had more discipline, he would remain on the straight, and maybe even on the narrow as well.

Geduld’s locks aren’t very long, but it’s tied in a messy bundle behind his head. This unmistakeable source of ill-discipline ensured that Geduld just went nowhere in life, and he finally sidestepped his way into the Blitzbok squad.

He too got his just deserts. After a gold medal in the 2014 Commonwealth Games, the long-haired lowlife ended up in Rio as well, and just as you thought, he too now hangs an Olympic bronze medal around his ill-disciplined neck.

After only a short glance at Rosko Specman, one can immediately tell that this young man completely lacks all kinds of discipline. His hair is long, his style is African, and it’s tied in a bundle on top of his head. He simply oozes ill-discipline. It flows from the top of his skull and down through his entire body.

This terrible discipline makes him break the line quite often, and he sets up many tries for others. Sometimes he even scores himself. He can’t help it, he doesn’t have any self-control.

Specman’s shattering changes in pace wouldn’t happen if he had discipline. Sometimes he meanders aimlessly in one direction, then suddenly he bursts at high speed in a different direction, causing havoc for the opposition.

After causing a lot of trouble on rugby fields around the world, Specman was finally banished to Rio, where they hung an Olympic Bronze medal around his neck.

Trouble sometimes comes in big packages, and Tim Agaba is big. His African locks are not so big, but long enough to land him a spot in the South African sevens squad.

After he was chosen, his life just went downhill. His discipline got worse and worse, until he finally became a critical member of the Blitzboks. The big man couldn’t escape the hard life. He simply did not have the discipline.

In 2016, he too ended up being an Olympic bronze medallist in Rio.

The Blitzbokke’s playing style include pure evils, like creativity and flair. This has made them one of the most feared gangs in the underworld of sevens rugby. Perhaps, if they had more acceptable hairstyles, they would play more conservatively, like their fellow wasters in the 15-man game. Perhaps they may even quit rugby altogether and become accountants. One can only hope. BN

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.


Wayde van Niekerk Investigated by Olympic Committee for Hyperalienism


Wayde van Niekerk points in the direction of his celestial ancestors.

RIO DE JANEIRO – South African athlete and Olympic gold medalist, Wayde van Niekerk, is under scrutiny from the authorities, following his performance at the 2016 Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

The sprinter from Bloemfontein in the Free State won gold in the 400m, smashing the long-standing record by American Michael Johnson in the process. Van Niekerk ran the 400m in 43.03 seconds, 0.15 seconds faster than the 43.18 Johnson ran in 1999.

In the aftermath of the race, allegations emerged that Van Niekerk may in fact be part Alien.

According to Olympic rules, athletes competing in the games must be fully human. Having Alien DNA, however little, could constitute an unfair advantage.

Hyperalienism is a condition where extra-terrestrial genetics get fused with that of a human. This fusion causes higher EBE (Extra-terrestrial Biological Enhancement), the result of which may be rapidly contracting muscles, superior stamina or superhuman strength.

The IOC has launched an investigation to determine the amount of EBE in Van Niekerk’s body. To date, the IOC is inclined not to comment on the matter, and all documentation remains tightly sealed.

Should Van Niekerk be found to be above the acceptable level of EBE, he may have to undergo treatment to subdue the effects of his condition.

Reaction amongst other athletes widely varied. British marathoner, Paula Radcliffe, in an interview on BBC radio said, “I fear that when we talk about it in terms of fully expecting no other result than Wayde van Niekerk to win that 400m at the Olympics, then it’s no longer sport and it’s no longer an open race.”

American sports journalist Kate Fagan defended Van Niekerk. In a column for ESPN, Fagan wondered why the South African runner is still on trial. “We have no idea on what point of the biological continuum each athlete resides, and who might have what advantages. And without that knowledge, the people currently ringing the alarm bells on Wayde Van Niekerk are actually engaging in discriminatory behaviour,” Fagan pointed out.

“We need to remember these are human beings,” IAAF President Sebastian Coe told reporters in Rio. “Even if they are part alien, they are still human beings. This is a sensitive subject, they are athletes, they are sons, they are brothers, and we need to be very clear about this. We will treat this sensitively. We need to go back and have the right people looking at this.”

In the meantime, Van Niekerk will hang on to his gold medal.

“I am not a fake,” he told News24 yesterday. “I am natural. I am just being Wayde. I don’t want to be someone I don’t want to be. I don’t want to be someone people want me to be.” BN

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.

New Rugby Rule: Victor Matfield May Play with a Kierie

Victor Matfield with a kierie

Victor Matfield resting his mature legs in between Bulls practice sessions.

AUCKLAND – The International Rugby Board (IRB) has passed a controversial law that would allow the ageing former Springbok captain, Victor Matfield, to continue his never ending career.

The new law would allow players, in particular the 38 year old Matfield, to play with the aid of a kierie to support the wilting knees and cowering back.

In a special meeting held in Auckland, New Zealand, the IRB decided that the fragility of old age should no longer be the deciding factor when it comes to players hanging up their boots. It was determined that a kierie may be used by players to sustain their elderly bodies.

The IRB laid out strict rules to regulate the use of a kierie during on-field play.

The kierie may be used for support, to allow Matfield to walk upright during the loose phases, but may not be used to give the player an advantage over the opposition.

During lineouts the kierie may not be used. Assistance for the jump must come from teammates, as always. Once the line-out is completed, Matfield may pick up his kierie and hobble to rejoin the maul.

Using the kierie for defensive purposes, such as tripping an attacking player by sticking it in front of his legs is strictly forbidden, and considered a red card offence. Shielding the ball from advancing defenders (known as cynical kierieing) will also not be tolerated.

Matfield and his kierie in action.

Matfield and his kierie in action.

Although the kierie may not be used to ruck the ball backwards, it can provide a foundation while pushing in the scrum.

At no point will a player be allowed to play the ball with his kierie while he is on the ground, although lifting yourself off your knees with the use of a kierie to play the ball will be permitted.

The kierie may only be manufactured from a soft wood. While it may increase the chance of cracking the kierie, it will decrease the chance of cracking a skull.

Matfield is absolutely thrilled about the new rugby rules. “Now I can play until I’m 50,” he grinned. “The Bulls will have no excuse to stop picking me.”

The end is nowhere in sight for the line-out specialist, who retired from rugby in 2011, but made a comeback in 2014. “Those days were hell,” he recalled. “I never want to do that to myself again. I really missed getting trampled in the rucks, pummelled in the driving mall and driven to the ground with a tackle. It was painful for me not to have so much pain in my life anymore.”

“As long as I can still hear the whistle, I’ll keep playing rugby,” he continued. “If only they would legalise on-field hearing aids, so I could hear the lineout call.”

Players from New Zealand and Australia are less thrilled about the new rules. “What the bloody heck is a keerey?” a few of them groaned.

Queensland Reds lock forward, James Horwell, complained about the extension of Matfield’s career. “I was hoping that one of these days we might be able to win a lineout ball again,” he moaned. “I might have to infuse myself with kangaroo DNA to extend my jump.”

Matfield is expected to test his new kierie during a SupeRugby match for the Bulls later this season. BN

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.

Ebola Coming to South Africa

Bafana Bafana in training for AFCON 2015

Bafana Bafana in training for AFCON 2015

SOWETO – The South African Football Association (SAFA) has announced that it will enter a bid to bring ebola back to South Africa in 2015.

Morocco was set to host the African Cup of Nations (AFCON) in January/February 2015 but pulled out, claiming they won’t be able to handle such an event. South Africa and Ghana were the only countries that responded to the Confederation of African Football (CAF)’s request to handle the ebola emergency.

South Africa also hosted ebola back in 2013, taking over when Libya pulled out due to security concerns. No country has ever hosted the occasion back to back in its entire 57 year history.

Ebola is very popular in South Africa, but concerns have been raised about hosting it. “We have been struggling lately, and I don’t think losing on home soil twice in a row will help our country’s morale,” said sports commentator Jabulani “The Peacemaker” Mangena.

There is hope that the new Bafana Bafana coach, Shakes Mashaba, will make a difference. “We’re pulling out all to stops to make sure we’re ready for ebola,” assured Shakes.”If it comes, we’re going to beat it.”

At the moment the South African public is not very interested in having the event again, but SAFA is confident that it will change. “It’s still early days,” remarked SAFA President Danny Jordaan, “but we all know that when the time comes, ebola fever will spread like wildfire.” BN

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.

German Invasion of Brazil Start of World War 3

Brazilians in pain after the brutal German attack in Belo Horizonte.

Brazilians in pain after the brutal German attack in Belo Horizonte.

BELO HORIZONTE – Following the German decimation of Brazil, its people, its hopes and aspirations, the Brazilian government formally announced its intention to retaliate by any and [nearly] all means possible. The announcement sent mild sparks of fear throughout the diplomatic community.

“We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills, but we won’t fight them on the football pitch,” declared Brazilian president Dilma Rousseff in a tear-filled press conference.

In the afternoon hours of Tuesday, 11 July, German forces rendezvoused at a football stadium in Belo Horizonte, the capital of the State of Minas Gerais in Brazil. After declaring its intention to become the champions of the world, the Germans proceeded to systematically annihilate their South American enemies.

Germanic vorsprung durch technik shone through from the onset of the skirmish, and in the space of 30 minutes they precision engineered an assault so devastating that it completely shattered the Brazilian nation physically, spiritually and space-dimensionally.

Despite sporadic acts of heroism, the Brazilians simply could not recover from the severity of the initial onslaught, and the Europeans continued to display their superiority.

The Germans, steadfastly fuelled by the philosophy that arbeit macht frei, kept on working hard, pounding the Brazilian defensive line, single-mindedly chipping away at the Samba Kings’ resolve.

The relentless blitzkrieg absolutely shattered the morale of the 200 million people-sized nation. Within a mere 90 minutes, Germany left Brazil so unsatisfyingly ravished that the country was forced to admit a humiliating defeat.

Not since the glory days of the holocaust has Germany been able to break the spirit of a people so swiftly and so severely. “I feel like I’m incarcerated at Auschwitch,” cried Jorge Camparo, eyewitness on the scene of the assault.

German nationalists are ecstatic over the advancement their side made in Brazil. “Deutschland über alles,” they shouted as they jubilantly took to the streets. BN


Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.

Herschelle Gibbs to Testify at Oscar Trial

Herschelle GibbsPRETORIA – Former South African cricketer Herschelle Gibbs will be called upon as a surprise last-minute addition to the witness list, sources within the Oscar Pistorius defence team revealed.

“We’re desperately in need of a real expert if Oscar is to be saved,” whispered a source that would rather not be named.

This hasty move came about as a result of Gerrie Nel’s brutal exposure of the defence’s expert witness Roger Dixon’s apparent ineptitude.Dixon, a forensic geologist at the University of Pretoria and a former policeman, was supposed to contradict parts of the evidence given by a police ballistics expert and the state pathologist who examined the body of Reeva Steenkamp, in an attempt to strengthen Pistorius’s case.

Prosecutor Gerrie Nel questioned Mr Dixon’s integrity in order to discredit his testimony. “What expert skills did you use?” Nel asked, to which Dixon replied: “I made a bat sound.”

“So your expertise was wielding the cricket bat?” Nel demanded to know.

Ultimately, Dixon admitted that he’s only a layman.

In order to rescue Oscar’s case, the defence will need to acquire the services of a real expert.

“My expertise is wielding a cricket bat,” confirmed Herschelle Gibbs in a brief statement at the Cape Town International Airport. Gibbs was rushing to make it to Pretoria to attend the rest of the Pistorius trial.

“My record is well known to everyone,” he continued. “I’ve certainly scored a few runs in my time.

Gibbs played in 90 test matches and scored 6 167 runs at an average of 41.95, and also scored 8 094 runs in 248 ODIs, at an average of 36.13.

Law experts believe that Advocate Barry Roux will attempt to prove that Oscar was not a top order batsman, and therefore bashed down the bathroom door purely by accident.

The former Protea opener is confident that he will be a competent witness. “I’m very familiar with the evidence,” he explained. “My signature can be seen on the bat used by Oscar to bash down the door.”

“In my current capacity as a cricket commentator for SABC Sport, I describe the wielding of bats all day long,” insisted Gibbs. “As such, I should be able to describe Oscar’s stroke making beautifully.”

According to Gibbs, he’s not afraid of the cross-examination tactics employed by Nel, by now nicknamed “The Pittbull” because of his aggressive style. “I’ve faced [Australian bowler] Glen McGrath,” he remarked. After surviving that, Gerrie will seem like a bit of a pie chucker.” BN


Barend Strijdom – Law Correspondent

Barend Strijdom – Law Correspondent

While serving time and trying to fight the system from the inside, Barend learnt a thing or two about the law. He follows the law closely, from a distance, and the law follows him. Do not tell anyone that he’s out.




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Mbalula Introduces Racial Quotas for Golf

Fikile Mbalula tries his hand at golf.

Fikile Mbalula tries his hand at golf.

JOHANNESBURG – Sports Minister Fikile Mbalula plans to introduce a quota system for golf in an attempt to rectify the racial imbalance currently prevailing in the elitist sport. At present, all South African golfers competing in major international events are white, which is a clear indication that black golfers are underrepresented on the global golf calendar.

Failure to field 60% black players in major tours will lead to golfers being banned from being South African at professional events. Golfers like Ernie Els, Retief Goosen and Charl Schwartzel will no longer be able to say they are South African when they compete in the PGA Tour. They will not be allowed to display the South African flag, and any good performance will no longer be a source of national pride for the people back at home.

This is according to resolutions taken by the Department of Sport following a meeting between Mbalula and the provincial MECs for sport. Mbalula said the group decided to introduce a 60% representation quota after noting that black kids just don’t really play much golf.

The minister cited the great success of the quota system in other sporting codes as inspiration for the new resolution. “As we’ve seen with the rapid transformation of rugby and cricket, forcing top down representation magically spurs on development,” he said.

Mbalula claims that, ten years ago, a kid living in a zinc shack in Tokoza would never have been able to own a cricket bat and pads, and that because of the achievements of black players like Makhaya Ntini, even to the poorest of the poor inexplicably now have access to expensive cricket equipment.

“We’re not sure how it works, but every time Lonwabo Tsotsobe bowls a delivery, a cricket bat poofs into existence in a young boy’s shack,” explained Mbalula.

Even rugby tells of a fairy-tale transformation where lives have been touched by national quotas. “The success on the rugby field of players like Brian Habana and Beast Moriwa has enabled township children to enjoy the same access to high quality facilities and fantastic programs run by experienced coaches as children from middle-class areas.”

Mbalula expects the same transformation success story to happen in golf. “If we have black South African players competing in international tournaments, golf courses will mushroom up in township areas, making the sport accessible to all. If kids from disadvantaged communities can see black players perform, they will be able to afford the great cost involved in playing golf, including clubs, balls and club membership fees.”

In fact, the quota system worked so well in other sport that the ministerial department plans to raise the required number of players of colour in rugby, cricket, netball and athletics as well. “I can already see a magnificent athletics track manifesting itself in a dusty Tembisa field by the sheer willpower of the transformative spirit,” grinned Mbalula.

The minister remains confident that an unwavering belief in supernatural anomalies will finally transform South African sport into a representative entity. “We can make unreasonable demands that would require divine intervention to reshape the socio-economic fabric of society in order to achieve transformation while maintaining a winning team,” remarked Mbalula, “and call everyone who don’t succeed a bunch of losers.” BN


Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.



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Rooibokke to Tackle Wales

RooibokkeJOHANNESBURG – In an historic and radical move, it’s been announced the Springboks will no longer play in their traditional green and gold jersey but rather in red and gold from June 2014.

The colour change forms part of the decision to rebrand the team as the “Rooibokke” as a result of Absa’s official sponsorship of the national side. The kit will be formally revealed in Cape Town later this month and will be worn by the players for the first time in a test against Wales at Kings Park in June.

South African Rugby Union (SARU) chief executive Jurie Roux says they would be “foolish if they did not look at ways to move the game forward” by exploiting commercial opportunities.

“There is always a risk of being dated and we thought there was no better time to make this announcement before the new jersey is unveiled later this month,” says Roux.

New kit sponsor Asics say the colour evokes feelings of passion, strength, courage and power – all values that will be needed as Heyneke Meyer’s side look to finally topple the All Blacks as the world’s best team.

Barclays Africa, which owns Absa, says it is “hugely honoured” to have the South African national rugby team now playing in the Absa brand colours.

The bank’s head of marketing, David Wingfield, says: “We wholeheartedly support this heritage and as the official sponsor of the team, are excited to be involved in this new departure.”

Former Bok captain Corné Krige says that while the decision has surprised him, he feels that fans will quickly get behind the Rooibokke.
“Going from green and gold to red and gold isn’t the end of the world. I think in future kids will be dreaming about playing in red and gold. As we long as we keep the Springbok emblem, it doesn’t matter.”

Source: Eyewitness News

Quinton de Kock Allowed to Play without Diaper

Cuddlers Quinton de Kock T20 Nappies

Cuddlers Quinton de Kock T20 Nappies

CHITTAGONG – The parents of South African cricketer Quinton de Kock has decided to let the young wicketkeeper/batsmen take the field without wearing his diaper for the first time in an official match.

“We feel that he has grown sufficiently as a cricketer and as a boy, and that he’s ready to take the next step,” remarked Ernest de Kock, father of the young run-making machine. “He also hasn’t wet himself in a while, so we believe that we can  take a chance.”

The decision comes as no surprise to those who have been following little Quinty’s meteoric rise on the international arena. “He’s been working extremely hard at his batting and fielding, as well as fitness training and also potty training,” insisted Protea Coach Russell Domingo. “The moment is ripe for him to take it up a notch.”

Nampak, the company behind Cuddlers Nappies and official sponsor of little Quinty, has threatened to withdraw their sponsorship deal if Quinton stops using their product.  “This is very unfortunate,” sighed company CEO André de Ruyter. “We were looking towards establishing a signature line of Cuddlers Quinton de Kock T20 Nappies, designed specifically for the more sportingly active baby. Without Quinty, that might be in jeopardy.”

Quinton is very confident that he’ll be able to perform on the field without the safety and comfort of a diaper. “Ooga ba tete ba  mmm ma goo,” he said, before his mother flew another aeroplane full of Purity into his mouth.

Although a bit worried, Mamma de Kock is excited to see her precious baby grow up. “We’re so proud of the little man,” she said. “He could barely crawl, but he was already swinging a bat around. As soon as he was able to stand up he started smashing balls all over the place… even broke a few windows and a coffee table.”

“Just look at him now, playing at a T20 World Cup,” Dad De Kock chipped in. “They grow up so fast.” BN

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Raoul Duke – Sports Writer

Like all good sportsmen, Raoul was born in the Free State before being offered more money to move to Gauteng. He has such a keen knowledge of the games that he doesn’t need to watch it to know what’s going on. When he’s not following athletes around, Raoul can be found on his farm near Bronkhorstspruit, drinking whiskey and shooting his gun.


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Millions Tune in to Watch Oscar

Ellen DeGeneres with an Oscar

Ellen DeGeneres with an Oscar

This time every year the world is consumed by Oscar fever, and this particular year didn’t disappoint. The anniversary of the incident came and went, as the public prepared themselves to follow all the action with renewed passion.

Earlier this year the court ruled that Oscar can be televised live. Ever since Justice Dunstan Mlambo decided that some parts may be broadcasted on television, the ordeal has become hotly anticipated, and experts believe it could become one of the most watched events of the year.

Early signs indicate that they may turn out to be right, as millions of viewers tuned in to watch the stars line up on the red carpet. Rumours started circulating that some people actually saw the films being honoured at the event.

Matthew McConaughey took home the award for best actor, while more awards were also handed out to other people for other things.

Jennifer Lawrence managed to fall flat on her face twice this year. Once outside, tripping soon after arriving, and once more inside, when she didn’t win anything. Last year she fell flat only once, when she tripped on her way up to receive her award.

Meryl Streep, Amy Adams and Lupita Nyong’o started dancing right there while the ceremony was still in full swing. Nobody had any doubt that they only showed up to get invites to the after party. Lupita even went as far as collecting an award [for best supporting actress] to ensure that she would get in.

Jared Leto [best supporting actor] took the time to thank the people of Ukraine and Venezuela for their committed and passionate support of his acting career.

The event was hosted by Ellen DeGeneres, famous for tweeting a tweet that got the most ever retweets, having been retweeted over a million times and temporarily breaking Twitter.

Due to his bail conditions, Oscar Pistorius unfortunately could not attend the event in person. BN

Saartjie Vermaak - Entertainment News

Saartjie Vermaak – Entertainment News

Saartjie wanted to be a pop singer but she couldn’t sing. Instead, she started following pop singers around. She became a journalist to avoid getting arrested.